MyPoopisGreen

How, honestly, do people function on their own?  There are many things that go wrong in life.  There are many things that can’t be controlled.  Most people accept that, live their lives, do their things, and move it along.  However, it seems as though when it comes to people’s health it is a very different story.  There is no understanding, there is no accepting, there is no patience in realizing that EVERYTHING takes time.  I mean, you don’t take cookie dough right out of the fridge and expect it to be cookies! Do you?  It takes time, you’ve got to put the globs of dough on the cookie sheet, place it in the oven, and then wait AT LEAST 8 minutes!  Then you’ve got to wait for them to cool, place them on a cooling rack, and then maybe 5 minutes later you can eat them considering you don’t want to burn your mouth!  It’s the same thing with your health!!!

So you’ve got a problem.  Example, you’re having an increase in heartburn symptoms.  You’ve been noticing that more and more often you are having heartburn after eating, or that at night when you are trying to sleep you have this vicious pain just under your rib cage in the center of your chest - and yes people, that’s where your diaphragm is located - but when you push on this area the pain is just horrendous! (Just a thought, DON’T PUSH ON IT!)  You might be a little more stressed than normal, and then there is this shooting pain right up into your jaw!  Now, if you’ve never had these pains, or discomfort before, I understand the alarm, this is a little bit of a scary situation when you are having “chest pains” and you don’t know why.  But, YOU have had these pains before considering you are on your Omeprazole (and it’s pronounced OH-MEPRAH-ZOL; the ‘e’ is silent…ever notice that when people are trying to pronounce medications that they don’t know how to pronounce they put an Italian accent into use?  No?  Just me, huh?) and it shouldn’t be a shocker that your acid reflux is kicking up a little bit.  You have an appointment on Wednesday - so you know what? Hang tight, understand that it might take a little bit of time for your two a day Omeprazole to start helping you out, since it’s a medication that builds up in your system and doesn’t work RIGHT AWAY, and in the meantime you could take your Tums, Maalox, or Mylanta to help with your symptoms if they are TRULY that horrible.  Don’t call me the day after I’ve given you these suggestions to tell me that it’s not helping and you need to be seen right away.  Stop it!  Ever think your symptoms might be worse because you are stressing yourself out so bad over your symptoms!  Breathe! Relax! And stop giving me a reason to swig Maalox right out of the bottle!

I don’t REALLY want to hear about the fact that when you were collecting your stool culture that you swear you saw something moving.  I don’t want to know that you then went on the internet and freaked yourself out with all the information that could or could not be true about what might possibly be going on with you.  Think about this - you collected stool cultures and whether something was moving or not (which is really disgusting by the way, again, STOP STUDYING YOUR POOP) you are giving these cultures to a lab, where there are lab techs that work with this stuff every day.  They know what they are doing.  They know what they are looking for and if per chance there was somthing “alive” I think they would see it!  Then they would call me, and pass on that lovely news to me to then share with you.  See?  Things take time.  As with anything in life.  Blood work, stool cultures, medications, test results - they take time!!!  Medicine, like life, is not like it is on tv.  Scrubs aren’t that form fitting.  George Clooney is NOT your doctor.  And results, diagnosis, and treatment, all take time.

So let’s all take a breath.  Let’s not give the doctor, the office staff, or yourself a gigantic headache that won’t go away.  Understand the things that are going on with you.  Read what you can, but don’t believe it all.  Know that everything takes some time.  And be reasonable about everything that’s going on.  I know that things can get frustrating when you don’t know what’s wrong.  This I understand all to well.  However, put things into perspective.  There is always someone worse off than you.  There is always something that is going to be more difficult to understand.  Not happy thoughts, I know, but it’s life.  It’s not all puffy clouds, bunnies, or chocolate chip cookies - but enjoy the things you can and accept the things that are beyond your control.  Take care of yourselves.  It’s all you’ve got.

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